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Misc. Funny Quotes (unattributed)
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Misc. Funny Quotes (unattributed)
Posted by
PEGASUS
(moderator) 27 Jan 2007 10:05am
I live in my own little world, but it's ok, they know me here.
Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected.
If life deals you lemons, make lemonade; if it deals you tomatoes, make Bloody Marys.
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Shopping tip: You can get shoes for 85 cents at bowling alleys.
I am a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I am perfect.
I married my wife for her looks...but not the ones she's been giving me lately!
Every day I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.
No one ever says It's only a game, when their team is winning.
If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway?
How come we choose from just two people for president and 50 for Miss America?
Ever notice that people who spend money on beer, cigarettes, and lottery tickets are always complaining about being broke and not feeling well?
How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.
The next time you feel like complaining remember: Your garbage disposal probably eats better than thirty percent of the people in this world.
Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.
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Play gin-rummy tournaments online
At GameColony.com you can play games of skill only -- play for free or play for $prizes!.
According to the statutes of most states in the United States, gambling is defined as: "risking something of value upon the outcome of a contest of chance". (Also see No Gambling!). The skill (as opposed to chance) is predominant in games of skill. Playing games of skill for $prizes, therefore, has nothing to do with gambling as it is not a contest of chance -- the more skillful player will win far more often. The chance element of a 'gamble' is either insignificant or missing. When players compete in tournaments or games of skill for $prizes -- it is "competitive entertainment" rather then "gambling". The more skilled winner will always win more matches, tournaments and $prizes.
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