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Laugh a little ;)
Posted by
Orfner
(VIP) 11 Dec 2009 6:01am
A cement mixer collided with a prison van on the Kingston Pass. Motorists are asked to be on the lookout for sixteen hardened criminals.
A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class one day. 'In English,' he said, 'A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative.' A voice from the back of the room piped up, 'Yeah, right.'
A ship was carrying a cargo of yo-yos, bound for San Francisco from Hong Kong. It was hit by a typhoon and sank twenty-three times.
Do you know the difference between God and a neurosurgeon? God doesn't think he is a neurosurgeon!
Hickory, dickory dock, three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck one, and the other two escaped with minor injuries.
It goes without saying that the Big Sittin' Goose Decoy Blind, a product that we are not making up, is designed for hunters. The hunter reclines in a sort of beach chair, then pulls the giant goose body down over his face, making himself virtually invisible, except for the fact that his arms and legs and gun are clearly sticking out. The idea is that when geese fly overhead, they look down and think: Hey! There's a person down there engaging in an act of perversion with a giant goose! Naturally the geese want to fly down and take a closer look. Anybody would.
The quantity of consonants in the English language remains constant. If omitted in one place, they turn up in another. i.e.: When a Bostonian 'pahks' his 'cah,' the lost r's migrate southwest, causing a Texan to 'warsh' his car and invest in 'erl wells.'
When God was creating the human race, he lined up all the males on one side and all the females opposite. Then he asked: Which of your species would like to urinate standing up? Well, the males went crazy, shouting that they wanted to pee standing up. 'Fine', says God, 'Women get multiple orgasms'.
NOT A LITTLE ... TONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by
LADY_AWE
(VIP) 11 Dec 2009 2:35pm
First, what does it say about me, since I have a Neurosurgeon?
And second, MO's cannot be measured on ... against ... or in substitution for anything on the face of the earth!!!!
HEHE
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